When people break a religious rule they are quick to scan the bible, Q'aran, Talmud or whatever book they use to find a way to make sure their sin is either forgiven or that the religious book in question is either vague on the rule or there is an exception. Some people even look to put some blame on the big man upstairs. "Yeah I coveted my neighbor's wife, but man that bitch is fine. If God didn't want me looking he wouldn't have made her so tempting."
I say all this to point out that the main people who are following their religion religiously are people who are crazy. That man on the train screaming about how Jesus is good, probably is not cheating on his wife. That woman with the billboard in Times Square telling us to be ready because Jesus is coming back next Tuesday at 5:43 PM probably isn't a thief. The point is this, if you make it to heaven it's going to be filled with crazies. That dude who smells like fish ass and rotten milk but is on the street telling you to repent might be there. Me, not so much.
Then there are those who speak in tongues. Now I don't want to crap on anyone's religious views but really? Speaking in tongues? For those of you who don't know, speaking in tongues is when someone becomes so full of the Holy Spirit or gin, that they start shaking and talking in the language of God. It sounds like pure gobbledygook. The theory is God is speaking through them; the problem is no one can understand it but them. Now God is a pretty important guy, more important than Bill Gates or the guy who owns Ikea. So what he has to say is pretty damn important too. I'm sure he doesn't want his message to be misinterpreted. I mean what if a tongue speaker says, "wjogjhgjb juion sdf" and that means 'Be kind to your neighbor' but someone hears "wjoKUIJB juion sdf" which means "Kill your neighbor." Why doesn't God just say it in English, I'm pretty sure He knows English, and I think French too.
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